The Compassion Road:
Depression, Suicide and Hope
Lately and not so lately, well-known people who we call celebrities, are committing suicide. . .
As one who has struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts for much of my life, and fear of talking about it, I’m finally coming to see that speaking up could lighten the load.
My heavy load, when I’m in the throes of an ‘episode,’ is I want to end my life, I want to give up. Everything appears futile.
I spiral into a place of despair, hopelessness — repeated unloving mind statements about my self — patterns that feel very hard to overcome.
I’m far far far away from my heart and the peace, Love, joy that is present there. I can’t stop reliving past trauma with fear of the future. I dissociate from my joyful everyday self.
My thought patterns are of sorrow, hatred, limitation, fear, control, that huge sense of futility.
Usually I hide this behaviour, somehow get through it, and don’t talk about it because of the shame I feel.
Lately, though, I’ve spoken a little more, slowly coming out of my cave of darkness, with a great deal of Divine Help.